It is rare for me to declare a day, week, month or year good or bad. I just bumble along trying to enjoy the good bits and figure out how to be gracious about the bad bits. I have always been this way. Maybe it is this attitude that has meant I have very little interest in New Year: if the past year has been neither good nor bad but full of the usual ups and downs, and if the coming year is likely to be pretty much the same, the idea of marking it all with a night of drinking and fireworks seems a little pointless.
I have to say that my long run of disinterest might have come to an end. 2016 was a particularly tough year for me. The feng shui project continued, making our house feel a lot less like home and reducing my ease of access in and out of the house. New, feng shui approved flooring looks good but aggravated my tendency to get a pressure ulcer on one foot so I took a long time getting on top of that and still live in fear of relapse. Meanwhile everyone says how nice the floor looks.
I reluctantly closed up shop as a doula. I still regard myself as a good doula and only yesterday a client thanked me for my encouragement but I am unsustainably bad at some other aspect of it. Maybe it's marketing or sales or maybe I'm just bad at business. I'm pleased that I tried.
I failed to gain other employment and it has been tough to put food on the table.
My youngest child and newest driver had a minor accident in June and despite her accepting responsibility for the damage, she is now in the process of defending herself in a civil case where the other driver is claiming exhorbitant car hire fees from her. Before the whole car hire thing came up, we thought we had put the accident behind us but in a cruel stroke of timing, and with no prior warnings or requests for payment, the court documents arrived the day before her final exam.
For, what I think is the very first time in my life, I am genuinely hoping that a simple change of page on a calendar brings a change in fortunes for all of us.