A couple of weeks ago, the phones at work were not able to transfer calls from the main reception number to us in admin. It was frustrating and the receptionist started telling people they would be best to email us.
One man, let's call him Joe, became slightly unhinged and word has it he phoned reception twenty times in an effort to speak to us about a room for his mum.
When I arrived the next day, there was an email from him and so I responded. He wanted to come in for a tour so we booked a time for the same day and I showed him around.
I did my usual spiel, designed to be friendly but also point out that there are many steps to admission and most people will never be offered a place, simply because we get about thirty enquiries for every vacancy.
Joe started asking if he could present his case to the manager, the head of nursing or the board of directors and I laughed him away.
A couple of days later he came in with a floral arrangement "for a resident"
The same day he came back asking if we had a volunteer program.
Next came a request for an introduction to the manager.
I had, of course, talked with the boss about Joe and she was aware of his goings on.
Then we were having a casual lunch for a colleague's farewell and in all of the chatter, Joe was mentioned. The area manager piped up and said that Joe had so many red flags, he could surround the place in flowers and still never get a place.
Joe's behaviour is all very stalker-ish and the flowers are unethical as well. Joe isn't frightening yet but it's only a matter of time.
When another email came from Joe I knew I needed to be firm and chilly. I even ran my response through chatGPT and asked for it to check the tone. ChatGPT told me my email was cold.
haha, Bingo!!
Hopefully that's the end of that story.
I am certain he is anxious to get his mum into quality care as quickly as he can. But if you are full, you are full!
ReplyDeleteI would give him the name of every care-home in whatever suburb he prefers, and wish him (and his mum) well.
I'm sure he has the best intentions but he's got people off side. And there are no rooms.
DeleteI tell the story just because I find people interesting. His approach is the most aggressive I have seen and he's also more pleasant than some.
His approach was aggressive, and I imagine he has spent his life getting his own way. That being said, I understand the panic of needing somewhere to place his mom where she will get quality care.
ReplyDeleteYes, he did tell me he was panicking. It's very hard to secure a place and in all truth, there's not much choice because people are forced to accept any room offered to them
DeleteAlarm bells went off when you said Joe isn't frightening *yet* but he's getting *stalkerish*.
ReplyDeleteThe initial request. A room for his mother. Did that come to nothing ? IS there a mother wanting a room ?
Frank Sargeson wrote short stories like this. I can imagine the title : Let's Call Him Joe.
You are dealing with passive aggression as Anne said (above). Is this just going to be the nature of the job ?
I wonder how many Joes there are here in Glasgow ?
I'm sure there is a mother but there was no space for her.
DeleteMost people who enquire are quite pleasant but in any job involving people there will be a few outliers!
I expect a the communication in Glasgow might be a bit more direct and change the trajectory of the interaction.
I didn't have to manage elder care outside my parents home, but can imagine how hard it is to find a place he's comfortable with. I guess the answer when literally no space is just that, but as Anne said, some people are used to working things to their way.
ReplyDelete"We have no room and an extensive waitlist" is the what i have been taught to say but not everyone understands that they need to move on.
DeleteRather sad. So the guy doesn't need a space except in his head.
ReplyDeleteWell I think my workplace is his preferred provider but his mother will be cared for where she is.
DeleteIt's interesting that the are so many who want a place in the home and there are so few vacancies.
ReplyDeleteThe marvels of chatGPT.
Everyone who needs a place tries everywhere so that means one person might have 10 enquiries in different places. When that gets multiplied across the population it means most enquiries will go nowhere.
DeleteChat gpt is dangerous but in this case I found it a good tool.
Joe picked the wrong tactics. A wad of cash in a brown envelope would have been far more effective. You could have paid for vehicle repairs with it or maybe a new kitchen appliance.
ReplyDeleteYou're funny!
DeleteIf i believe someone is trying to step out of line i bristle so even though the money would be handy it would need to be a very generous envelope!
Yet somebody will be allocated a room when the next inmate departs. Who makes that decision? Did Joe just not make his move early enough?
ReplyDeleteThe centre manager has the final say and i can make recommendations.
DeleteJoe didnt move too late, he was just trying his ham fisted way of navigating a stretched system
I think your spidey senses were good. Give this guy an inch and he would take a mile. We have literally hundreds on the waiting list for my building and it's very difficult for the managers to sort out the ones who "make" the list. And with his aggression he would not even be considered. Flowers. Incredible.
ReplyDeleteXO
WWW
Thank you, WWW.
DeleteI can't always articulate why i hold an opinion but I have learnt that I have a good instinct
He certainly sounds like trouble. Hopefully your email will keep him away but he sounds like the fanatically insistent type.
ReplyDeleteSilence so far. Maybe he's moved on to more powerful people
DeleteJoe does sound needy and clingy.
ReplyDeleteIn the week since i wrote this he has completely disappeared
Delete