# 27 thankful for red shoes

Today I bought a new pair of shoes. These ones here. There is an amazing story to match these shoes and it's time for me to tell it.
I have mentioned here once before that I am affected by a disease called Charcot-Marie-Tooth (CMT). I don't want to get into a dicussion of the disease right now ( ask whatever you want, I'm just leaving it out in favour of the story) but what I will tell you is that it can make walking difficult. A flat pathway or floor is good but something as simple as a thick plush carpet can be problematic, sand is a near impossibility.....
buying shoes is an enormous problem, too. You see, it needs to be just the right height, too flat and it upsets balance, too high and walking becomes near impossible. The shoe needs to grip the foot, walking takes enough concentration without the added hassle of a shoe that might slip off. The shoe will preferably be quite light because the heavier it is the more tired it makes you and the more tired you get the harder it is to walk.
So, you can see that the shoe buying options are narrowing by the minute. I like to imagine myself as a snappy kind of a dresser but I have always been let down by my shoes, restricted to matronly things or the much maligned crocs.

A few months ago I found myself in a church service where there were some guests of our ministers present. My minister asked if I wanted them to pray for me, with me.
Now, I'm not a fan of being prayed over in my presence, I always feel immensely exposed but not wanting to be churlish I agreed. This couple knew nothing about me but they prayed and prayed. Eventually the man told me that he thought there was something to do with dancing in my future. "I would love to dance" I said "but...." I explained the impossibility of me ever dancing and the woman decided to pray for my healing.
By this time I felt like some kind of prize show exhibit but I submitted to further prayer, I was declared healed and told to go and claim the healing I had been given.

How do you claim healing? How do you live the life of a healthy person when you live with disability? How do you imagine that you can be normal when you have never known normality?

The next day I decided to wear a pair of shoes that I had always found tiring, shoes that I could not have worn for long periods, shoes that I didn't wear if I could possibly wear my beloved crocs. It was the best I could come up with at the time. I have worn those shoes every day since.

Right now I can't tell you I am fully healed. I can tell you I find shoe buying easier. I seem to have just a bit better tolerance of varying styles and heights. I think, though I may be kidding myself, that I walk a bit more normally than I did, with less of the CMT gait. I think I have a bit more stability and a bit more stamina but I can still find myself struggling to keep up with the crowd.

I find this story unbelievable, frightening even, but I have to tell you that a few months back I would not have bought the shoes I did today. I think that this story will continue but if it doesn't, if I never improve on what I am today, I will be grateful for just a few more options in fashionable footwear.